[STUBBORN STUBBORN STUBBORN we'll see how long that lasts.
but kni is considerate enough to not keep zulius waiting, seated on one of the park benches wearing a dark hoodie that is probably (definitely) two sizes too big for him. he doesn't want to be here and he wants zulius' attention (concern) even less. it feels wrong, undeserved.
worse case scenario maybe he could text vergil to redirect zulius' attention (concern) elsewhere.]
[It's honestly adorable that Kni thinks that Vergil would take his side over that of his partner in this one. As if Vergil doesn't distinctly know what's good for him.
Zulius trots over to where Kni is skulking on the park bench, he has a little shopping back over his arm- he was not joking about the care package, did you think you would escape it, young man? Hah. He comes to lean against the bench (sitting on it is something one can only really do if they bend in human ways), glancing over at the teen. ]
kni wrinkles his nose at the sight of that bag, willing it and all of its lovingly-put-together goodies to disappear with every ounce of his non-existent psychic energy. unfortunately this does nothing and the bag remains undamaged.
he lets his head fall back and makes a disgruntled noise in response to zulius.]
I'd never heard the end of it if you got yourself lost in the woods looking for me.
[Zulius sees the nose wrinkle and pointedly puts the package beside Kni. It remains undamaged. Existing. A solid reminder that he is loved and cared about no matter what he thinks or feels. ]
SO true, your life would have been way, WAY worse if that would have happened.
[He nudges the bag a little closer.]
This is for you. It's got your fave snacks in, a couple of real stuffy books, some hand warmers aaaaand [He pulls out a crochet scarf. ] This! I made this myself so you super-duper can't turn it away. It's getting COLD, you need to stay warm.
[he is surrounded by these reminders everywhere he goes now, but he can't help but try and push against the flow. would he still have zulius' affectionate concern if he knew just what kni did on that ship? or even what he's done before his time in kaisou?
that frown doesn't dissipate in the slightest when the bag is nudged closer to him. of course the gifts are thoughtful and kind in nature and kni wants so badly to decline, he doesn't need anything he is fine-]
I've been been fine. [but the scarf is soft and well-made, even if it's red. he handles it gently, all while still frowning.] The church is warm enough at night.
[ Kni would be very surprised, the depths of which Zulius' love and support would go to. He watches him frown at the gifts , but he doesn't baulk. Instead, he folds his arms, sighing softly. ]
Warm enough is not the same as actually warm, Sweetie. There's a big difference there.
[He's quiet a moment. He doesn't like talking about it, he actively avoids talking about it- but now this nonsense has happened again... well, it looks like the time to avoid it is done. ]
This happened last year, too. Were you here for that? This uh... [his ears pin back, unhappy] kidnapping horrorshow... thing.
[the scarf will sit nicely folded on his lap as kni looks up at zulius' question.]
I was here, but I don't know what happened. [he remembers there being a flurry of panic and stress amongst the adults around him, but vash had been unharmed so kni never bothered to dig any further into what had happened. not that knowing more about it back then would have helped much this go around, but...]
Yeah. It... wasn't space for us. We had a creepy cabin in the woods- got stalked by these creepy monster things that tracked people's movements. [His hand moves to his neck, rubbing it absently.] It was reallly bad. A lot of people died, and it made us all a little screwy? Not as bad as it sounds like it did for you guys, but still enough we put ourselves in danger all the time. I died. Like actually died.
[It was a real bad time! He hated it.]
Anyway my point is, I avoided talking about this for like, almost a whole-ass year and you know what happened? I ended up freaking out a lot when your uncle Vergil nearly got himself killed fighting the Order. Like a massive freakout- because I'd been holding all that bad ju-ju in for all that time. Because I didn't wanna talk about it and not talking about it felt easier. Turns out: it so isn't.
[kni stays quiet, listening and watching as zulius talks. trapped in a cabin out in the woods, surrounded by creatures with dangerous intent... and no one seemed to know they were gone until it was already too late. he notes the way zulius touches his neck, imagining the way he must have died. such a gruesome fate didn't fit with the exuberant and bright presence zulius emitted.]
I'm not... avoiding it. [but it's a little different for him, isn't it? the murder and bloodshed isn't something he shies from, all too familiar with the stench of blood and how it stains his skin. killing came easy to kni. defending himself and vash on that ship came very easily to him and he knows he'd do it again if it meant keeping vash safe or wolfwood alive--]
I've already come to terms with what happened out there. So, there's nothing for me to talk about now.
[It was an absolutely horrific time and Zulius still has nightmares about it, he expect he always will at this point. At Kni's comment he arches an eyebrow. ]
Okay, Kni? Honey? Sweetie? I super do not like talking about this so if I'm gonna open up a door I usually keep extremely closed, I'm gonna have to need you to stop the BS train at this station and work with me here.
[ In other words: he's not buying it. ]
I get you've got a whole different thang going on, but you are still a sixteen-year-old-kid and you're obviously going through it, or you wouldn't be hiding in the woods, avoiding everyone, would you? You'd just be going through your day-to-day like normal. But you're not which shows that, well, a, you're not a sociopath and also b, something there freaked you out.
[he snaps back, frustration underlining his tone. how does he put into words that he's still haunted by that rotting hallucination, afraid that if he looks at wolfwood now he'll see it again. he feels surrounded by tragedy, helpless to stop any of it.
but he owes it to vash not to cause him more trouble. maybe he can't help what he does back in his own world, but here he can't keep falling into those old habits.] Wolfwood died, but Vash... he suffered so much. If I was there they'd just... fret. [his hands tighten into fists over his lap, eyes fixated on the scuffed up grass between his boots.] I know they're worried, but this is- it's better.
[Zulius doesn't react to the outburst, just examining his fingernails as if Kni was just telling him how his day went. He waits until the teenager is done, before heaving out a sigh. ]
Oh, honey, no. It's not better. Not for you. Not for them. They're gonna fret either way, and I promise you that they are fretting a lot more not knowing where you are. Not knowing how to reach out and help you while you're hurting because you're not there. Because they suffered a lot, but so did you.
[He reaches out to put a hand on Kni's shoulder, to give it a little squeeze.]
What you all need right now is to be together, because that's what family does. You kinda need to stick together through this mess - it's the only way you're gonna heal. Aren't you tired, Kiddo? Don't you wanna go home? I know they want you to.
[he really needs to keep a tighter lid on his emotions, knowing any further breaking down would just make zulius dig his heels-- hooves in harder. even after a year and some change, he doesn't know how to handle the support and care given to him over and over and despite zulius' sincerity, kni still feels undeserving of it. the little squeeze has him finally looking up at zules.]
[Kni is correct that Zulius will dig his hooves in. What he doesn't know is there doesn't need to be a breakdown for that. Zulius will care unconditionally for him regardless. Welcome to being loved, you stubborn little shite. He nods, heaving out a sigh. ]
Yeah, that's fair. You've not exactly had it easy, and this place is doing everything it can to stop you from just having a regular childhood.
[Which it can stop at anytime now, thanks! He considers. ]
Only if you check in with them. Just a little message to your family so they know you're safe. They'll feel WAY better hearing it from me than you.
[He examines his fingernails. ]
Aaaaand if you don't go home in a few days, I'm gonna come for you. Zero mercy.
Zulius, my school teachers and classmates all thought I was part of a cult. They still do, actually. There's nothing regular about anything here.
[but he's had more here than he would have had anywhere else, too. kni could never discount the view of the summer sun rising and setting from that back porch, the sounds of conversation floating through the open kitchen window. those little moments were fleeting and precious.]
You really don't need to do that.
[kni folds the scarf up, setting it back in the bag zules gave him.]
Okay, fair point, how about instead: as regular a childhood as you can have in all the chaos? Will that work, Grouchy Pants?
[Work with him here, Kiddo! Zulius flaps his hand, dismissively. Because Zulius Bunter doesn't make threats, he makes promises, and he plans to stand by that one. ]
Good, you better or you'll find I SO need to do that. Because I worry about you, and that's just how I show my affection.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ornamentals) wrote2030-07-01 11:44 am
no subject
[STUBBORN STUBBORN STUBBORN we'll see how long that lasts.
but kni is considerate enough to not keep zulius waiting, seated on one of the park benches wearing a dark hoodie that is probably (definitely) two sizes too big for him. he doesn't want to be here and he wants zulius' attention (concern) even less. it feels wrong, undeserved.
worse case scenario maybe he could text vergil to redirect zulius' attention (concern) elsewhere.]
no subject
[It's honestly adorable that Kni thinks that Vergil would take his side over that of his partner in this one. As if Vergil doesn't distinctly know what's good for him.
Zulius trots over to where Kni is skulking on the park bench, he has a little shopping back over his arm- he was not joking about the care package, did you think you would escape it, young man? Hah. He comes to lean against the bench (sitting on it is something one can only really do if they bend in human ways), glancing over at the teen. ]
Hey you, really glad you decided to show up.
no subject
kni wrinkles his nose at the sight of that bag, willing it and all of its lovingly-put-together goodies to disappear with every ounce of his non-existent psychic energy. unfortunately this does nothing and the bag remains undamaged.
he lets his head fall back and makes a disgruntled noise in response to zulius.]
I'd never heard the end of it if you got yourself lost in the woods looking for me.
no subject
SO true, your life would have been way, WAY worse if that would have happened.
[He nudges the bag a little closer.]
This is for you. It's got your fave snacks in, a couple of real stuffy books, some hand warmers aaaaand [He pulls out a crochet scarf. ] This! I made this myself so you super-duper can't turn it away. It's getting COLD, you need to stay warm.
no subject
that frown doesn't dissipate in the slightest when the bag is nudged closer to him. of course the gifts are thoughtful and kind in nature and kni wants so badly to decline, he doesn't need anything he is fine-]
I've been been fine. [but the scarf is soft and well-made, even if it's red. he handles it gently, all while still frowning.] The church is warm enough at night.
no subject
Warm enough is not the same as actually warm, Sweetie. There's a big difference there.
[He's quiet a moment. He doesn't like talking about it, he actively avoids talking about it- but now this nonsense has happened again... well, it looks like the time to avoid it is done. ]
This happened last year, too. Were you here for that? This uh... [his ears pin back, unhappy] kidnapping horrorshow... thing.
no subject
I was here, but I don't know what happened. [he remembers there being a flurry of panic and stress amongst the adults around him, but vash had been unharmed so kni never bothered to dig any further into what had happened. not that knowing more about it back then would have helped much this go around, but...]
Did you experience it, as well?
no subject
Yeah. It... wasn't space for us. We had a creepy cabin in the woods- got stalked by these creepy monster things that tracked people's movements. [His hand moves to his neck, rubbing it absently.] It was reallly bad. A lot of people died, and it made us all a little screwy? Not as bad as it sounds like it did for you guys, but still enough we put ourselves in danger all the time. I died. Like actually died.
[It was a real bad time! He hated it.]
Anyway my point is, I avoided talking about this for like, almost a whole-ass year and you know what happened? I ended up freaking out a lot when your uncle Vergil nearly got himself killed fighting the Order. Like a massive freakout- because I'd been holding all that bad ju-ju in for all that time. Because I didn't wanna talk about it and not talking about it felt easier. Turns out: it so isn't.
no subject
I'm not... avoiding it. [but it's a little different for him, isn't it? the murder and bloodshed isn't something he shies from, all too familiar with the stench of blood and how it stains his skin. killing came easy to kni. defending himself and vash on that ship came very easily to him and he knows he'd do it again if it meant keeping vash safe or wolfwood alive--]
I've already come to terms with what happened out there. So, there's nothing for me to talk about now.
no subject
Okay, Kni? Honey? Sweetie? I super do not like talking about this so if I'm gonna open up a door I usually keep extremely closed, I'm gonna have to need you to stop the BS train at this station and work with me here.
[ In other words: he's not buying it. ]
I get you've got a whole different thang going on, but you are still a sixteen-year-old-kid and you're obviously going through it, or you wouldn't be hiding in the woods, avoiding everyone, would you? You'd just be going through your day-to-day like normal. But you're not which shows that, well, a, you're not a sociopath and also b, something there freaked you out.
no subject
[he snaps back, frustration underlining his tone. how does he put into words that he's still haunted by that rotting hallucination, afraid that if he looks at wolfwood now he'll see it again. he feels surrounded by tragedy, helpless to stop any of it.
but he owes it to vash not to cause him more trouble. maybe he can't help what he does back in his own world, but here he can't keep falling into those old habits.] Wolfwood died, but Vash... he suffered so much. If I was there they'd just... fret. [his hands tighten into fists over his lap, eyes fixated on the scuffed up grass between his boots.] I know they're worried, but this is- it's better.
no subject
Oh, honey, no. It's not better. Not for you. Not for them. They're gonna fret either way, and I promise you that they are fretting a lot more not knowing where you are. Not knowing how to reach out and help you while you're hurting because you're not there. Because they suffered a lot, but so did you.
[He reaches out to put a hand on Kni's shoulder, to give it a little squeeze.]
What you all need right now is to be together, because that's what family does. You kinda need to stick together through this mess - it's the only way you're gonna heal. Aren't you tired, Kiddo? Don't you wanna go home? I know they want you to.
no subject
I've been tired since I first came to this city.
[which isn't a lie, so that's something.]
... I'll go back in a few days. Is that better?
no subject
Yeah, that's fair. You've not exactly had it easy, and this place is doing everything it can to stop you from just having a regular childhood.
[Which it can stop at anytime now, thanks! He considers. ]
Only if you check in with them. Just a little message to your family so they know you're safe. They'll feel WAY better hearing it from me than you.
[He examines his fingernails. ]
Aaaaand if you don't go home in a few days, I'm gonna come for you. Zero mercy.
no subject
[but he's had more here than he would have had anywhere else, too. kni could never discount the view of the summer sun rising and setting from that back porch, the sounds of conversation floating through the open kitchen window. those little moments were fleeting and precious.]
You really don't need to do that.
[kni folds the scarf up, setting it back in the bag zules gave him.]
... I'll talk to Vash.
no subject
[Work with him here, Kiddo! Zulius flaps his hand, dismissively. Because Zulius Bunter doesn't make threats, he makes promises, and he plans to stand by that one. ]
Good, you better or you'll find I SO need to do that. Because I worry about you, and that's just how I show my affection.